Too little
Letting the next clip decide
“Just this one, and then whichever comes after it.”
Each small pleasure makes the next decision, while the evening you intended slips away.
Temperance
Let a pleasure have its place without taking every place.
Readiness to moderate appetites rather than let them dominate judgment.
Temperance gives pleasure a fitting place and measure. Growing freedom includes deciding how an evening will be spent when nobody is announcing that it is time to stop. Something can be genuinely enjoyable and still occupy time you wanted for another purpose. The measure depends on your circumstances and what you value.
Temperance gives room for more than the next small pleasure
The exam is tomorrow. You finished revising and opened a short video for a break. Several excellent dogs later, the break has acquired a sequel, a sequel to the sequel and most of the evening. Another clip begins. You put the phone aside while it is still interesting. The dogs have done nothing wrong. You also wanted some rest before a morning that matters to you.
Finding the balance in Temperance
An enjoyable stream of short videos is taking time you meant to leave for rest before an exam.
A fitting response
Giving enjoyment a measure
“That was a good break. I want to leave time for the rest of my evening.”
You finish an enjoyable activity because another purpose also matters.
Pursued too far
Treating pleasure as a fault
“I should never have watched anything.”
A useful limit becomes punishment when it treats enjoyment itself as something to regret.
The pleasure can be worthwhile even when continuing it no longer fits the evening.
What Temperance makes possible
Temperance helps you enjoy something without asking it to supply everything. A break can refresh a demanding day; an evening off can be valuable in its own right. Choosing a stopping point leaves room for other goods, including rest, company and commitments you freely care about. You can return to the videos another time without needing to declare war on the dogs.
Temperance in ordinary life
A free afternoon
Enjoy an absorbing series when you have room for it. A fitting measure can include a generous stretch of leisure.
A shared evening
Turn the music down when you also want to hear your friend. The occasion can hold more than one pleasure.
Nearby virtues, different work
Self-Command
Self-Command directs the immediate impulse to keep watching. Temperance considers the place and measure of that enjoyment within the life you want.
Discernment
Discernment weighs what matters in this situation. Temperance brings appetite into a fitting relationship with that judgment.
Temperance and its counterfeits
Counterfeit Temperance: pleasure on probation
Requiring every enjoyable minute to earn its place through productivity makes leisure a suspect. A proportionate limit should leave something worth enjoying.
How to cultivate Temperance
Notice when a chosen break begins to choose the rest of the evening.
Consider what else you want the available time to hold.
Choose a workable stopping point and another occasion for the enjoyment.
Try it today
Choose one ordinary leisure activity. Before beginning, consider what else matters in the available time and a stopping point that would leave room for it. Afterwards, notice whether that measure suited the occasion; you can adjust it.
Questions worth returning to
- What did I enjoy, and when did I stop choosing it attentively?
- What other good would a different measure leave room for?
Keep the practice proportionate
An exam result or a difficult night is not a verdict on your character. Review the choice without punishing yourself for enjoying the break.
Quotations and further reading
Seven selections to return to through the week. Follow a source link to read the surrounding passage.
Its flowing curves and bendings are a real pleasure; only breath is wanting …
Helen Keller · The World I Live In · The Seeing Hand
Her tactile encounter with sculpture gives enjoyment a particular object and texture. Thoughtful measure should preserve this capacity to savor, rather than make pleasure itself suspect.
Aiming thus at something else, they find happiness by the way.
John Stuart Mill · Autobiography · Chapter V
Mill describes a theory he formed after a period of distress: worthwhile pursuits can carry enjoyment without making its constant pursuit the whole task. This philosophical reflection is not advice for treating distress.
In fact, by our expenses, I was constantly kept unable to pay my passage.
Benjamin Franklin · Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin · First Visit to London
Franklin describes entertainment spending that displaced a journey he intended to make. The passage makes opportunity cost concrete, without supplying a budget or a rule against amusement.
His own enjoyment, or his own ease, was, in every particular, his ruling principle.
Elinor Dashwood · Jane Austen · Sense and Sensibility · Chapter XLVII
Her assessment of Willoughby concerns pleasure becoming the governing reason even when others bear the cost. The criticism targets that dominance, rather than the existence of enjoyment.
Have regular hours for work and play, make each day both useful and pleasant …
Mrs. March · Louisa May Alcott · Little Women · Chapter 11
After the girls’ experiment with unrestricted leisure, their mother also warns against the opposite extreme of endless labor. The relevant insight is room for both; her broader promise about life’s outcome is not adopted.
In spite of lessons the students found opportunities for pleasant times.
Narrator of Anne of Green Gables · L. M. Montgomery · Anne of Green Gables · Chapter XXXV
The account of study at Queen’s also makes room for visits and friendship. A demanding commitment can coexist with an enjoyable life.
… and idled away the mornings at billiards, which ought to have been devoted to business.
Narrator of Sense and Sensibility · Jane Austen · Sense and Sensibility · Chapter XLII
The narrator’s qualified portrait of Mr. Palmer notices leisure displacing a responsibility. The problem is its place in that morning, rather than billiards as such.
Continue through the catalog
Practice this collection
Choose this approved collection as an optional workbook program, or select individual virtues in My Virtues.